Long Ago and Far Away...

Some (many) of you WOOFers out there may not remember this era, but it brought back my "small-town" memories. (The author is anonymous)




Long ago and far away, in a land that time forgot,
Before the days of Dylan, or the dawn of Camelot.

Ike was in the White House in that land where we were born,
Where navels were for oranges, and Peyton Place was porn.

We learned to gut a muffler, we washed our hair at dawn,
We spread our crinolines to dry in circles on the lawn.

We longed for love and romance, and waited for our Prince,
And Eddie Fisher married Liz, and no one's seen him since.

We danced to 'Little Darlin,' and sang to 'Stagger Lee'
And cried for Buddy Holly in the Land That Made Me Me.

We fell for Frankie Avalon, Annette was oh, so nice,
And when they made a movie, they never made it twice.

We didn't have a Star Trek Five, or Psycho Two and Three,
Or Rocky-Rambo Twenty in the Land That Made Me Me.

Miss Kitty had a heart of gold, and Chester had a limp,
And Reagan was a Democrat whose co-star was a chimp.

We had a Mr. Wizard, but not a Mr. T,
Oprah couldn't talk, yet, in the Land That Made Me Me.

We had our share of heroes, we never thought they'd go,
At least not Bobby Darin, or Marilyn Monroe.

For youth was still eternal, and life was yet to be,
And Elvis was forever in the Land That Made Me Me.

We'd never seen a rock band Grateful to be Dead,
Airplanes weren't Jefferson, Zeppelins weren't Led.

Beatles lived in gardens then, and Monkees lived in trees,
Madonna was a virgin in the Land That Made Me Me.

We'd never heard of microwaves, or telephones in cars,
Babies might be bottle-fed, but they weren't grown in jars.

Hardware was a box of nails, and bytes came from a flea,
And rocket ships were fiction in the Land That Made Me Me.

There were no golden arches, no Perrier to chill,
Fish were not called Wanda, and cats were not called Bill.

And middle-aged was 35 and old was forty-three,
Ancient were our parents in the Land that Made Me Me.

But all things have a season, or so we've heard them say,
And now instead of Maybelline we swear by Retin-A.

They send us invitations to join AARP,
We've come a long way baby, from the Land That Made Me Me.

So now we face a brave new world in slightly larger jeans,
And wonder why they're using smaller print in magazines.

And we tell our children's children of the way it used to be,
Long ago and far away in the Land That Made Me Me.

Milkbone (Mary)

Do you have special memories of the 50s or 60s? Post a comment, or e-mail us! GreatDames@WoofersClub.com


*Thanks to Kim for the e-mail!

Keep On The Sunny Side

I am the “baby” in an over 55 community. Most people would think being surrounded by lots of widows in their 70’s and 80’s would be depressing. I find it inspiring.

Many of the women in my neighborhood have suffered through some tragic events and currently face health and financial issues. Yet, with few exceptions, they are still as positive and productive as they can be.

Take Miss Pattie for example. She will be 90 in December, has been a widow for over 25 years, and is also a cancer survivor. I have never seen her without a big smile on her face and a joyful comment about something.

Mozelle can barely walk, yet to my knowledge she has never uttered a word of complaint about the pain she suffers as a result of arthritis. She is always so interesting and has given me a lot of useful advice.

Pauline lives next door to Mozelle and is amazing. I’m sure she is somewhere in her 80’s also, and yet she thinks it is “no big deal” to drive in nearby Dallas. She is tough and won’t let that awful traffic stop her from visiting family and friends.

And then there is Dovie, who keeps us all laughing. Her life has not been a bed of roses, but she uses her quick wit to turn almost any situation into a humorous one. I often have tears rolling down my face after spending time with Dovie, particularly when she talks about older men that just want “a nurse and a purse.”

My neighbor across the street, Ann, has cancer. She is a gifted artist and after seeing how much the chemo treatments cost, she spent $2,000 of her own money to have note cards printed with her artwork on them. She is selling these special cards to raise money for those patients who can’t afford the chemo her insurance covers. All of the money she is taking in goes directly to a foundation at the hospital. In her darkest hour, Ann is still reaching out to help others.

All of these women have traveled down different paths, have weathered different storms, and have new struggles ahead. But “sunny” words—sometimes hilarious—are all they use. Like one day when Dovie said “Come on girls. Let’s get up and go out before we mildew!”

I like to go to lunch with “the girls.” Their spirits shine through their aging faces and frail bodies. On one recent outing I saw Miss Pattie’s eyes still dancing with enthusiasm, and said, “I want to be you when I grow up!” And I do. God Bless the ladies who show me every day that life—despite its ups and downs—will always be better if you keep on the sunny side.

Is She Born Yet?

Will she be from Oregon? Delaware? Wisconsin, New Mexico, Alaska or Hawaii? The next woman US presidental candidate.

Politics aside, we can be proud (or should be if we aren’t) that citizens in this country opened their minds enough to actively support a qualified woman running for president. (The fact an African-American man also found his way to that rank is historical as well. Whoo-hoo!)

Again, leaving political parties and personalities at the polling booth, the WOOFer generation is potentially the last to truly appreciate the significance of this milestone. My mother was born around the time women were granted the right to vote in this country. So she was too young to remember struggling suffragettes. Her mother did, however.

That means a woman I have known in my lifetime, a woman who touched me …with whom I talked, laughed and cried…experienced firsthand the joy and responsibility of claiming her place next to men in determining the fate of our country and her own life.

Another of my role models is Elizabeth Cady Stanton (seated here with Susan. B. Anthony), social activist and leading figure of the early woman's movement in America. I think it’s my duty as a woman to share her words with my daughter and granddaughter, who will then, I hope, pass them on to other women and young girls.

In 1892, after fighting for female suffrage and women's rights for five decades, Stanton made her final appearance before members of the US Congress, and spoke on the central value of the individual. From Solitude of Self:

"The isolation of every human soul and the necessity of self-dependence must give each individual the right to choose his own surroundings. The strongest reason for giving woman all the opportunities for higher education, for the full development of her faculties, her forces of mind and body; for giving her the most enlarged freedom of thought and action; a complete emancipation from all forms of bondage, of custom, dependence, superstition; from all the crippling influences of fear--is the solitude and personal responsibility of her own individual life. The strongest reason why we ask for woman a voice in the government under which she lives; in the religion she is asked to believe; equality in social life, where she is the chief factor; a place in the trades and professions, where she may earn her bread, is because of her birthright to self-sovereignty; because, as an individual, she must rely on herself…”

Women have come a long way the last 100 years, from the time they were arrested and beaten for standing in front of Woodrow Wilson’s White House, peacefully waving flags printed with the commander-in-chief’s own words about the rights of Americans.

Still we have not seen a woman occupy the Oval Office. But I just bet Stanton is smiling right now, her hand on the pulse of every American woman’s birthright, merely wondering: Is she born yet?

d.d. dawg

The Sippery Art of Book Reviewing

What are YOU reading?

For all you WOOFer "wanna-be" book reviewers, have we got a book for you!

June is 'Book Reviewing' month at Blog Critics Magazine! To promote the release of The Slippery Art of Book Reviewing, author Mayra Calvani will be interviewing 15+ reviewers and review editors during the month of June. Learn all about the business of book reviewing and what's in the mind of some of the most popular reviewers on the internet today. Some of the guests will include: Alex Moore from ForeWord Magazine, James Cox from Midwest Book Review, Irene Watson from Reader Views, Andrea Sisco from Armchair Interviews, Magdalena Ball from The Compulsive Reader, Sharyn McGinty from In The Library Reviews, Lea Schizas from Muse Book Reviews, Linda Baldwin from Road to Romance, Hilary Williamson from Book Loons, Judy Clark from Mostly Fiction, and many others! To see the complete lineup, visit: The Slippery Book Review Blog.
Stop by and leave a comment under the interviews for a chance to win a Virtual Book Tour (sponsored by Pump Up Your Book Promotion, a $150 value!) or a $50 B&N gift certificate!

We also wants to encourage all WOOFers to send comments to WOOFers Club Blog about your favorite books. Let us know what you're reading...what you like, along with what you don't like!