WOOF: Media Monday with Fabulous Way-Over-Fifty Fonda!

Women Only Over Fifty remember 1982 and feeling the burn along with 45-year-old Jane Fonda and her workout tape! (some of us may still feel that burn!)

Well, now she's 72 and back with a new workout DVD for ladies in the prime of their lives. (yes, that would be us!) Here's just a brief part of the conversation she had recently with Oprah.

“Do you feel as great as you look?” Oprah asked on The Oprah Winfrey Show.

“Yes,” Jane announced. “I think it’s just getting better!

“Over [age] 50, people tend to get happier and less anxious,” she explained. “[Life] gets better and easier.

“One part of wisdom is knowing what you don’t need anymore and letting it go,” she added. “We don’t have to keep going back there. Been there, done that. I survived. I can do it again.”

Jane Fonda Prime Time: Fit & Strong DVD
Women Only Over Fifty

Resolution: Outsource Resolutions!

I realize there's a lot of debate about outsourcing. BUT in the interest of becoming a "more perfect WOOFer" and utilizing my time and energy to the optimum (while bequeathing my bestest WOOFer buds a reason for living and breathing), I hereby, thusly, and all that jazz, outsource my 2009 resolutions:

To Milkbone: All of my cardio and strength training exercise; payment (in full) of any and all of my health club membership dues; my mammogram and colonoscopy exams.

To Mad Dog: Any and all of my financial debt, to be paid in full by January 2; successful increase of my annual income to $500 billion by January 3.

To Alpha Canine: All of my current volunteer responsibilities; founding and funding a new 501c3 (The d.d. dawg Do Good Stuff Foundation) to save the planet, stop hunger, cure cancer and clone Johnny Depp.

To Pedigree: Any and all of my marketing, emailing and blogging duties; successfully scheduling interview spots for ME ALONE on Ellen & Oprah.

Wow, I feel new and improved already! Wait. Perhaps I should outsource my feelings to...Hey, where'd everybody go?!?!?

Now it's YOUR turn...Let the outsourcing begin!

(Speed read the following like an announcer at the end of a drug ad: Recent research shows that while 52% of participants in a Resolution study were confident of success with their goals, only 12% actually achieved their goals. Men achieved their goal 22% more often when they engaged in goal setting, a system where small measurable goals are used (lose a pound a week, instead of saying "lose weight"), while women succeeded 10% more when they made their goals public and got support from their friends.)

-- d.d. dawg (Diana)

Dogs Rule!

Dancing dogs. One joyful dog with only two left legs. The tiniest dog. Footage of the largest dog. A dog who does math problems—without a calculator. A Golden Retriever who nurses tiger cubs. A dog, rescued hours before he was to be put down, doing “handstands” for Oprah.

Pretty doggone amazing. WOOFers sure picked great role models. Even though there are those in the canine community who come to an untimely end, through no fault of their own. But right now that’s not the intent of this post.

This post celebrates people who stand up for animal rights. Folks, like the caregivers at Angel Gate who believe in nurturing animals disabled from neglect or abuse by focusing on what they can do. Not on what they can’t.

Oh, and how do the dogs in their care respond to that kind of treatment? Come here. Let me lick your nose, and I’ll show you.

d.d. dawg (Diana)

Long Ago and Far Away...

Some (many) of you WOOFers out there may not remember this era, but it brought back my "small-town" memories. (The author is anonymous)




Long ago and far away, in a land that time forgot,
Before the days of Dylan, or the dawn of Camelot.

Ike was in the White House in that land where we were born,
Where navels were for oranges, and Peyton Place was porn.

We learned to gut a muffler, we washed our hair at dawn,
We spread our crinolines to dry in circles on the lawn.

We longed for love and romance, and waited for our Prince,
And Eddie Fisher married Liz, and no one's seen him since.

We danced to 'Little Darlin,' and sang to 'Stagger Lee'
And cried for Buddy Holly in the Land That Made Me Me.

We fell for Frankie Avalon, Annette was oh, so nice,
And when they made a movie, they never made it twice.

We didn't have a Star Trek Five, or Psycho Two and Three,
Or Rocky-Rambo Twenty in the Land That Made Me Me.

Miss Kitty had a heart of gold, and Chester had a limp,
And Reagan was a Democrat whose co-star was a chimp.

We had a Mr. Wizard, but not a Mr. T,
Oprah couldn't talk, yet, in the Land That Made Me Me.

We had our share of heroes, we never thought they'd go,
At least not Bobby Darin, or Marilyn Monroe.

For youth was still eternal, and life was yet to be,
And Elvis was forever in the Land That Made Me Me.

We'd never seen a rock band Grateful to be Dead,
Airplanes weren't Jefferson, Zeppelins weren't Led.

Beatles lived in gardens then, and Monkees lived in trees,
Madonna was a virgin in the Land That Made Me Me.

We'd never heard of microwaves, or telephones in cars,
Babies might be bottle-fed, but they weren't grown in jars.

Hardware was a box of nails, and bytes came from a flea,
And rocket ships were fiction in the Land That Made Me Me.

There were no golden arches, no Perrier to chill,
Fish were not called Wanda, and cats were not called Bill.

And middle-aged was 35 and old was forty-three,
Ancient were our parents in the Land that Made Me Me.

But all things have a season, or so we've heard them say,
And now instead of Maybelline we swear by Retin-A.

They send us invitations to join AARP,
We've come a long way baby, from the Land That Made Me Me.

So now we face a brave new world in slightly larger jeans,
And wonder why they're using smaller print in magazines.

And we tell our children's children of the way it used to be,
Long ago and far away in the Land That Made Me Me.

Milkbone (Mary)

Do you have special memories of the 50s or 60s? Post a comment, or e-mail us! GreatDames@WoofersClub.com


*Thanks to Kim for the e-mail!

WOOFers To The Rescue!

Women Only Over Fifty with a "new leash on life." Have we got a book and a club for you!

From Oprah to Ellen to our water aerobics instructor, it’s all about the joys of aging! How 50 is the new 30! Whatever!

Some of us are hounded by middle-age. We’re dog-tired, wrinkled as a Sharpei and barking like a bitch.

Enter: WOOF: For the over-fifty woman itching to howl at the aging process. From issues of graying hair, expanding waistlines and wrinkling tattoos, to embracing triumph over personal tragedy, WOOF raises four paws to our past accomplishments, present realizations and future dreams.

Are you up to it...dogtrotting alongside this sisterhood taking the second half of life by the tail? We know you are. After all, the past 50 years you’ve gained freedom! You’ve gained power! You’ve gained wisdom!

(Don't tell us you think weight is the only thing you've gained. Oh, you so need
WOOF...)

WOOF! Women Only Over Fifty - Look for it this Summer in your favorite bookstore or online.

“A howl a day keeps the scowl away!”

d.d.dawg, Milkbone & Mad Dog

And, if you're in the West Georgia area, stop by and say, "Hey!" d.d. dawg and Milkbone will be at the Carrollton Mayfest, Saturday, May 3rd from 10:00AM-4:30PM. We'll be "somewhere in the vicinity" of Adamson Square!